Calvinism or Arminianism?

Brother/Sister,

If you are struggling with Calvinism or Arminianism- you have serious issues with Unconditional Election, Limited Atonement and Irresistible Grace, etc... And you are bothered at the idea that God died only for a select few... Do you think that this doctrinal issue will ever be resolved here on earth before we get to Heaven? I doubt it. Here is the advice which I would like to give you with the hope that it will be helpful towards bringing you to peace in your heart about this controversial theological issue. 

Personally, I did examine this issue too a long time ago. For long now, I have been at peace about it. The saying of Philipp Melanchthon, Martin Luther's collaborator has been of great help to me:

In Essentials, Unity
In Non-Essentials, Liberty
In All things, Charity

While I believe in right doctrine and theology, I feel that we must never forget to uphold and live out Our Lord's New Commandment in John 13:34-35. Our Master did not say, "By YOUR STRICTLY 100% RIGHT DOCTRINE", all will know that you are My disciples. Instead, it is by "our love agape for one another" that all will know that you are My disciples. 

In John 17:21, Our Lord prayed for the unity of all believers in Him, that we may all be one as the Father and the Son are One, that the world may believe that Father God has indeed sent Jesus Christ.
Love and unity must prevail in the christian family and church.

So, Dear Brother, Dear Sister,

agape should be our priority (I Peter 4:8; Proverbs 10:12b; I Corinthians 13:4-8). Think most carefully whether the issues you are struggling with falls under the category of 'Essentials' or 'Non-Essentials'. 

Grace and Peace in Christ from your brother.
Ephesians 4:15